Parents who tell parents of newborns to cherish these times as the best of their lives are seriously delusional. But, having been through this a couple of times before, I think it's more a case of amnesia. We don't remember much a few years later.

Maybe it is a result of sleep deprivation and the sleeping cycle. I vaguely recall, and now, re-experience, that for the first 3 to 6 months, we seldom sleep more than 3 or 4 hours at a time. My wife and I take turns...and our babies have been bottle fed, so I can do the midnight/2am feeding and then she gets 4am or so...and then we're awake at 6 anyway...but it is flexible. And it's not like we sleep through the times when the other person is feeding the baby. Sometimes I don't remember who did what the night before. And it all blurs into a stream of semi-consciousness anyway.

Maybe the amnesia is the result of positive reflection. As the kids are older, you look back fondly on the time when they were growing up? It is a miraculous process. But being in the midst of the process is no joy.

It is a different type of hard than people who are not experiencing it can imagine. We are fortunate to have wonderful, healthy children with no serious medical issues. And we are fortunate in our circumstances that allow my wife to stay home full time while I work at a company where family is valued and respected. We are fortunate to have had many friends offer help in many ways. But there is no denying the period of difficulty all parents must go through. And I know, from experience with our two other children, that this time will pass and we will forget what it felt like to walk through life in a bit of a daze. Before you know it, the crying baby is getting ready to start kindergarten. You don't believe that when people tell it to you...but it happens.

The newborn is like the winter solstice--it is the beginning of new life and new things--but it is only the beginning. There are months of dark and snow and cold to get through before the spring begins. And plenty of challenges ahead. The cycles rolls on and we must know that we can love the journey while we suffer the moment at times.